ORC XBALLS

You are a minor goddess. Your worshippers are busy killing each other.

On the continent of the Wildlands, the Orc people are on the brink of extinction. Endless wars, undying grudges, and a species running out — which happens to be your problem too: if your Orcs die out, you go with them.

Hence your idea, brilliant though you say so yourself: replace war with a sport. A ball game, perpetual tournaments, no rules worth the name. One that can end in death as easily as in love — and sometimes in both.

You are not a coach. You are a deity.

You don't decide how a match ends. You decide who takes the field, who rests, who works, and who gets sold at auction.

• Recruit on a market where Orcs sell themselves to the highest bidder — they are as venal as they are lecherous.
  
• Keep the team alive between tournaments: it takes money, and the work on offer changes from village to village.
  
• Field a squad (one goalkeeper, two attackers, two defenders) and line up substitutes. There will be casualties.
  
• Travel between the seven surviving villages, following the tournaments and the opportunities.

Matches are turn-based

Move, pass, tackle. Every action is a gamble — and a tackle lets you decide what your Orc makes of it: knock the opponent out, send them to the infirmary, kill them. Or strip them. Or take them right there: in Xball that's a legal move, even if it puts you both out of play for a few turns. Fifty teams compete without pause, and the rankings don't lie.

And the other objective

Repopulate the species. You set fertility and birth rates to your liking, then let Orc nature take its course — it has never needed encouragement. Pregnancies, births, bloodlines: your squad renews itself, provided your players get the chance. They find it.

What's waiting for you

• Fifty teams, seven villages, tournaments without end
  
• Hundreds of generated Orcs, with their traits, their skills and their bloodline
  
• An overall ranking that rewards showing up to tournaments
  
• A few situations the Wildlands will let you discover on your own

Adult content

This game is intended for an audience aged 18 and over. It contains sporting violence (tackles, injuries, blood), crude language, nudity, suggested or explicit sexual content, and dark themes.

Every Orc you will meet is an adult, and they all signed up for this: Xball is a sport where you score as much with sex as with force, the rules allow it, and nobody steps onto the field without accepting them. After that, with Orcs, everything tends to turn to sex — or failing that, to slaughter, which is considerably less fun.